Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
