you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Found your dick twin last night
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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