belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize