TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
