i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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