He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize