I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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