would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
