I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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