So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
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