I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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