you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
