not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
