so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Randomize
