Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
