So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize