The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize