im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
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if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
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do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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