So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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