I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize