u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
