Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
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My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
did i just pee glitter
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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