Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize