Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
My hand turned me down
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
are you so shy because you have an std?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
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