i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
