Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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