On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
