Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
