Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
