I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
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Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
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Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Ladies don't puke and tell
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in