Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?