Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
