nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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