I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
