i wish peter jackson would direct porn
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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