Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize