You made me cry and you don't even care
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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