I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
