Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
