I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
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