drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
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I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
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She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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