sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Hippo gnu deer
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
