vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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