You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize