I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
they need to just BURY HIM!
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
