eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.