Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
