Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
