obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
So much rum. So many feels.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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