I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
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at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
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You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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