I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
